My Very Own Fairy Tale

I'm excited to share my first blog post in which I’ve decided to speak seriously and sincerely instead of silly-ly or jokingly. As you see from the title this post is about how I truly feel about “fairy tales” and “happily ever after”. Especially my own. Those of you who know me understand that I love Disney princesses and fairy tales and regency romances and any type of feel good movie where the two people end up happily ever after. However I feel to clarify with the world my views regarding this term and others associated with it. Many of you know that I am on the verge of marrying my high school sweetheart and the most amazing man of my acquaintance. I love Kevin more than perhaps words can express. He is – as they say – my “Prince Charming.”

On television, in magazines, on the big screen or anywhere else you may chance to look there are many women and girls who feel like they have “found” their true love or who are “looking for” the fairy tale they’ve always dreamed about. To me, however, true love and fairy tales aren’t found – they’re made.

I believe we sometimes fool ourselves into thinking that a fairy tale is just happened upon - that you meet that one special person and from that moment on it’s flowers and sunshine and lollipops. I really feel though that you have to make your own fairy tale. I feel that you need to accept the others’ differences and work to overcome challenges together. Since Kevin and I met almost 10 years ago, we have had difficulties. There have been times in our relationship where we didn’t understand each other, where we maybe felt hurt or misunderstood; there were even times of separation and heartache. At the same time though there were times of laughter and silliness, times of peace and joy and many deep feelings of love. All of these emotions and obstacles have led us to be the head-over-heels couple that we are today. Has the road been blissfully happy and free of worries? No of course not. Is my Prince Charming absolutely perfect? Well, no actually. But I’m not a perfect princess either. We know that each one has weaknesses and faults and yet we understand that only together can we overcome them.

You may wonder if I feel like this “fairy tale” we share was just stumbled upon or found. But I don’t. I believe that through love and determination and honesty we have made it our fairy tale – we have made a love so strong and deep that it will last.

On that same note I think that “happily ever after” isn’t something you achieve when you say I do at the altar. It lasts for much longer than that and is brought about through commitment and sacrifice. I know that for Kevin and I to make it forever it means that I will have to make sacrifices, that at times I will need to sacrifice my own will and pride in an effort to make our marriage work. I will need to be so committed to the promises we made that nothing will sway me from that path. I have no doubt that our marriage will be filled with many trying times – times of sorrow, times of hurt, times of struggle and times of sadness – but I also know that as Kevin and I are committed to each other and practice principles of honesty and compassion there will be nothing in this world that will keep us from living “happily ever after”.

Unlike many people I talk to, I don’t think it’s necessary that a couple lives together first to judge compatibility or to test the “happily ever after” hypothesis. Think for a moment of a love or marriage that you admire and respect… perhaps your parents, or your grandparents, or your dear friends. Was it necessary for them to live together first to achieve the happiness they found? Or was it a result of perseverance, love, sacrifice, and dedication to each other? When I marry Kevin, what I’m really saying is that I love him enough to make it work. I know that as we both think of the other more than ourselves, that as we love and pray for each other, that as we sacrifice and persevere and support each other, the love and happiness that we share will last forever. I am absolutely sure that our marriage will be joyful and enduring and blissfully happy. Why? Because that’s what we’re going to make it.